Mission?

I THINK I'M GOING TO SERVE A MISSION FOR THE CHURCH OF JESUS CHRIST OF LATTER-DAY SAINTS. I'M JUST GOING TO GET MY PATRIARCHAL BLESSING AND SEE HOW IT GOES. IT'S A REALLY SCARY DECISION AND I STILL CAN'T BELIEVE I'M GOING TO DO IT. BUT I HONESTLY THINK IT'S THE RIGHT CHOICE FOR ME TO MAKE AND I'M STARTING TO GET REALLY EXCITED. PLUS IT'LL MAKE IT A LOT EASIER ON ME WHEN PRESTON LEAVES BECAUSE I'LL BE GONE AS WELL. AND IF EVERYTHING GOES WELL ME AND HIM WILL GET HOME AROUND THE SAME TIME AND THEN HOPEFULLY WE CAN JUST PICK UP WHERE WE LEFT OFF. I'M GOING TO START PRAYING ABOUT IT AND ASK HEAVENLY FATHER IF I'M MAKING THE RIGHT DECISION SO I KNOW WHETHER THIS IS THE PATH I NEED TO TAKE. I'M REALLY GOING TO MISS MY FAMILY BUT IT'S ONLY FOR A YEAR AND A HALF AND THAT'LL FLY BY. I CAN'T EVEN BEGIN TO WRITE DOWN ALL THE THINGS THAT ARE RUNNING THROUGH MY MIND! I JUST WANT TO GET UP AND LEAVE RIGHT NOW. I'VE ALWAYS WANTED TO SERVE A MISSION, AS LONG AS I CAN REMEMBER, BUT I NEVER THOUGHT I ACTUALLY WOULD. EVER SINCE THEY CHANGED THE AGE LIMIT FOR YOUNG WOMEN TO SERVE IT'S BEEN WEIGHING ON MY MIND. I HAVEN'T THOUGHT ABOUT IT FOR THE LAST FEW MONTHS JUST BECAUSE I'VE BEEN SO PREOCCUPIED WITH PRESTON BUT EVER SINCE HE WENT BACK TO COLORADO I CAN'T HELP BUT THINK ABOUT WHERE I NEED TO BE A FEW MONTHS FROM NOW. SCHOOL JUST NEVER FELT LIKE THE NEXT STEP IN MY JOURNEY AND I COULDN'T FIGURE OUT WHY BUT ONCE I MADE THE DECISION IN MY MIND I WASN'T GOING TO SCHOOL IN THE FALL, I FELT AN OVERWHELMING PEACEFUL FEELING. I TOLD MY PARENTS ABOUT IT AND THEY SAID THEY HAD BEEN FEELING THAT WAY TOO ABOUT ME SERVING A MISSION. THEY JUST WANTED ME TO MAKE THAT DECISION MYSELF WITHOUT ANY OF THEIR INFLUENCE. I'M STILL A LITTLE SHOCKED WITH MYSELF. I CAN'T BELIEVE I'M GOING TO DO THIS. I'M ONE OF THE SHYEST PEOPLE I KNOW AND I'M GOING TO GO TO ANOTHER STATE, POSSIBLY COUNTRY, AND TELL COMPLETE STRANGERS ABOUT THE CHURCH. I CAN'T BELIEVE IT. BUT I CAN'T IGNORE THIS FEELING.WOW. THIS IS ABSOLUTELY CRAZY.