Sunday, May 5, 2013

Already?

SO I WOKE UP THIS MORNING THINKING I STILL HAD THREE DAYS LEFT WITH THIS KID.. AND I COME TO FIND OUT I HAVE ABOUT THREE HOURS. I COULDN'T BELIEVE WHAT I WAS HEARING AND I SERIOUSLY WANTED TO THROW UP... AND IF YOU KNOW ANYTHING ABOUT ME THAN YOU KNOW I ABSOLUTELY HATE THROWING UP. I KNEW THIS DAY WAS COMING FOR MONTHS NOW BUT I DIDN'T KNOW IT WAS GOING TO BE SO SOON. PLUS I WASN'T PREPARED FOR IT TO BE RIGHT NOW! IT'S ONLY SUNDAY AND HE DOESN'T REPORT TO THE MTC UNTIL WEDNESDAY.. I'M NOT EXACTLY SURE WHAT I'M GOING TO DO UNTIL THEN. I CAN'T EMAIL OR WRITE HIM YET BECAUSE HE'S NOT THERE BUT AT THE SAME TIME I CAN'T CALL OR TEXT HIM. SO I'M STUCK IN LIMBO. AND IT ABSOLUTELY SUCKS. THE WORST PART ABOUT ALL OF THIS IS THAT I CAN'T EVEN BE MARKING OFF DAYS! THIS DOESN'T COUNT AS HIS MISSION SO THESE NEXT FEW DAYS ARE JUST DAYS FOR ME TO BE MISERABLE WITHOUT ANY REWARD. THEN TO TOP IT ALL OFF MY MOM IS IN ST. GEORGE UNTIL TUESDAY SO I'M GOING TO BE HOME ALONE, STRANDED WITHOUT A CAR FOR TWO DAYS.. YAY. 
OKAY OKAY I'M DONE VENTING NOW. I KNOW IT'S NOT GOING TO BE THAT BAD. IT'S GOING TO BE HARD, DON'T GET ME WRONG, BUT I'M NOT GOING TO DIE. I'LL BE OKAY. FOR THE PAST HOUR OR SO I'VE ACTUALLY FELT PRETTY GOOD. I HAVEN'T CRIED, WHICH IS A GOOD SIGN! PRESTON EMAILED ME A FEW HOURS AGO AND IT MADE ME SO INCREDIBLY HAPPY SO I WANTED TO SHARE IT ON INSTAGRAM WITH MY FRIENDS AND FELLOW MISSIONARY GIRLFRIENDS. EVERYONE WAS SO NICE AND SUPPORTIVE.. IT MADE ME REALIZE THAT I'M NOT THE ONLY GIRL OUT THERE FEELING LIKE THIS. THERE ARE TONS OF OTHER GIRLS THAT MISS THEIR MISSIONARIES AND THEY ARE DOING JUST FINE. IF THEY CAN DO IT, WHY CAN'T I? 
I'M ACTUALLY REALLY EXCITED TO BE A "MISSIONARY GIRLFRIEND". THERE ARE SO MANY FUN THINGS YOU CAN DO! PACKAGES.. PICTURES.. COUNTDOWNS.. LETTERS.. EVERYTHING SOUNDS SO NICE! IMAGINE HOW GREAT IT'LL BE WHEN YOU GET A MONTH CLOSER OR YOU GET A LETTER IN THE MAIL AND YOU START TO CRY BECAUSE OF HOW HAPPY YOU ARE. THAT SOUNDS PRETTY AMAZING AND I'M HAPPY I GET TO EXPERIENCE ALL OF IT. I LOVE PRESTON AND HE'S WORTH THE WAIT. NO MATTER HOW HARD IT FEELS RIGHT NOW, I'LL BE FIFTY BILLION TIMES HAPPIER WHEN HE COMES HOME TO ME. 

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