Sunday, January 19, 2014

Today

I can't even begin to describe to you how I feel about today. 
It's such a mixture of emotions and my mind is going crazy thinking about it all. I began telling myself, don't worry today is almost over. I'll go to sleep, wake up and it'll be tomorrow. Then I realize tomorrow won't be much better either. It'll probably actually be worse. What a sad thought huh? 
I should be excited! I should be happy!
But I'm more nervous than anything.
Its the kind of feeling you get when you know something big is coming. Some sort of big change and you're not sure if it's a good or a bad thing. So all you can feel is nervous. 
The only thing I have going for me right now is the love I feel from our Heavenly Father. Knowing He's there and He's willing to listen to my problems, makes all the difference in the world. 

I know I need to be open, I need to be willing to go the way the Lord would have me go. Sometimes is just hard though. Especially when you want something so badly but you're not sure if you can have it. I keep repeating to myself to be open. To not get so set on something and be disappoint if it doesn't happen. I still can't help but have hope. 
Hopefully tomorrow I'll be able to slow down my mind and really focus on what I should do. Or at least calm down enough so I can think clearly! For now I just need a good nights sleep. 

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